Kiki Dunst Just Isn't Working For Me Anymore
I don't know when it happened but Kirsten Dunst just isn't working for me anymore.
I realize that I am the last remaining human to admit this. Maybe it's a failure on my part somehow, I just don't know. But whatever it is, I am unable to understand her appeal.
It doesn't help that Kirsten Dunst has become more universally hated than the one hot girl at fatty convention.  Let's face it, I am not an island, I could only withstand the peer pressure so long. I AM HUMAN DAMMIT! And to be perfectly honest people, Kirsten Dunst is...well...she's fug in ways I can't understand.
Maybe I was under some kind of Spider-Man spell. She looked hot in that dress when Doc Ock had her all chained up and her bazongas were all full, wet and busting through her dress. Wow, that sounded vaguely arousing. I am not aroused okay. Anyway, since that time I have watched Spider-Man 1 and I have watched Spider-Man 2 and I am over it. She is not pretty.
You know what, her ass doesn't even try. Dirty blonde hair, pale skin, pointy teeth and a sour expression are not the key ingredients to hot. They are the key ingredients to urban legends involving tales of the undead who feed on the flesh of the living. And my nightmares.
So call me a sell out, call me shallow, call me short-sighted, okay, that's enough name-calling jackass. Bottom line: Me and the Kikster, we're through.Â
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