Bad Santa
Though it seems ridiculous, I took my 5 month old to see Santa the other
day. I know, I know- I am lame. And I know, I know-she doesn't care
yet. Believe me, I've heard all of this from my husband. But I
can't help it. I had to take her for picture's sake.
And we all know that when he's not in the North Pole, Santa lives at your typical urban sprawl shopping mall. So, we made the trek out to Flatirons Crossing last week.
After waiting in a stupidly long line of other mommies and babies that are too young to give a flip, it was our turn.
"Just hold your baby tight and then walk her in backwards, sit her down quickly and run back. We don't want her to turn back and see him and get upset," the photographer said. Kinda funny I thought. But I suppose I would be scared too if I didn't understand why a weird, bearded (and in our case nearly toothless) man held me on his lap. I did as the lady said.
Cora doesn't seem to get freaked out yet by this kind of stuff. She just chilled there looking at her toes. And that's when he shot me the first one. While they were taking pictures and ringing bells to get Cora to look up instead of at her feet, Santa winked at me.
Okay. I thought. Ya know, 'tis the season, right? Saint Nick always has a sparkle in his eye, right? But before I could think much further, he winked at me again. This time I looked around to see if anyone else had noticed. In particular, my dad, who came to the mall with me that day.
I mean, I am all for the spirit of kindness, and magic and crap this time of year, but this guy is definitely not Santa. As far as I know he is a car salesman by trade. He just dresses up each December 'cause he has the gut and the beard.
When I went up to grab Cora, he smiled real big. “Thanks for letting me hold her.” I grinned awkwardly and walked back to pay for a pic trying not to glance at him again.
I donno, maybe I’ve had too much spiked eggnog this season, or maybe I’m imagining things. But I am pretty sure Santa may have hit on me. Wha?
Well, at least now I have a picture of Cora’s first time with Santa Claus. Though she may never remember meeting Saint Nick, I am pretty sure I’ll never forget it.
This is an original Rocky Mountain Moms Blog post.


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