Separating my twins — What was I Thinking??
Several months ago I appeared in an SV Moms A Byte Out of Life video along with fellow twin moms Linda and Akemi and discussed the pros and cons of separating our twins in elementary school. It has been almost 3 months now since Alfie and I sent our boys off into separate classrooms for their kindergarten year, and I'm happy to say things are going really well. Each of them has their own special place they can call their own, where everybody knows their name. They don't have to be compared to anyone else or be singled (or doubled?) out for their uncanny resemblance to each other; rather, they're appreciated as individuals. They still share many of the same interests and friends, and it hasn't affected the bond between them at all. All in all, it looks like both boys are happy and thriving on their separate schedules.
If only I could say the same for myself. When we made the decision to separate them in elementary school, I did pause a minute to consider that separate classrooms meant separate workloads and schedules, but I nobly disregarded that as a factor in making our decision. After all, our daughter is on her own schedule, so why shouldn't each of my sons be? And now, much to my selfish chagrin, I've found that having twins in separate classrooms is making my life absolutely crazy!
For one thing, separate classrooms means that each boy gets to have separate, and therefore different, experiences. That's a great thing, but I've learned that comparisons — and competition — are inevitable. When the kids had their Halloween classroom parties, one of them got to gorge on sugary treats while his brother's class stuck to fruit and cheese. Guess who got jealous? If I volunteer to read or help out with an art project in one boy's class, the other will look at me with such sad doe eyes that I feel a maternal obligation to match my volunteer commitment, hour for hour. The other day Room 2 went on a field trip; I sure hope Room 3 gets their turn at some point, or I'm never going to hear the end of it.
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